Change and Unconditional Love

The ancient sages and mystics had a way of distilling simple truths into basic elements; of demystifying the mysterious. In ancient times, love was defined merely as acceptance, and hatred was defined as non-acceptance or wanting to change something or someone.

If you take a moment and honestly look at what it is you have been seeking your whole life you may find that your search is that one being who will accept you for all your faults and shortcomings-the One who will accept you totally in sickness and health, for richer or poorer, just as you are-the One who will forgive you and embrace you whole heartedly. This is what we are hoping for from early childhood to old age. It is man's oldest search.

The questions that trouble man at the very core are:

"Is there one being who could accept me unconditionally without any judgement whatsoever?"

"Is there one being that can be mine and mine alone?

"Is there one being who could embrace me with all his/her heart and trust me totally?"

So great is the quest for acceptance (love) that thousands of dollars are spent in attempting to be more beautiful, to make more money, to be more intelligent etc. The desire behind all of this is to gain acceptance.

On the other hand the ancient definition of Hate was merely non-acceptance or wanting to change something or someone.

For example a lady might say. "I want to change my hair style," She is in essence saying "I hate (do not accept) my hair as it is. Another may say, "I want to change the decorating" She is saying I hate this place so I want to change it. When the new bride says "I want to change some things about my new husband. He should cut his hair and get a better job and cook now and then." Can we say that she loves (accepts) him unconditionally?

If we look into our lives we can see this illustrated. Think of an example when you wanted to change something about yourelf. It is because you could not accept that part of yourself any longer. The constant struggle for perfection is deeply rooted in man's self-hatred.

How is it you feel in your heart when someone is trying to change you? A mother might say to her child, "Honey if only you were this way!" Or "I love you very much but you must change your sloppy ways and get better grades." The child realizes he will not find unconditional love in his mother. At times a child tries so hard to change and please that during his life he becomes what can only be called a "Love Beggar." He becomes like the dog who barks and wags his tail at the same time-he is confused and confusion always leads to conflict. He tries so hard to change to gain the acceptance of those who would want to change him-that cannot accept him- that he loses his inner integrity.

With the understanding of love as defined by the ancient enlightened ones as acceptance, and the ancient understanding of hatred as non-acceptance or desiring to change something, coupled with the seeing of this dynamic of acceptance and non-acceptance in my own life, it is with great interest that I watch the politicians and their followers with the cries, banners, and songs of Change.


DD